Dipstick
(Ring) Hello? Yes, this is Federico with United Parcel Service. Who am I speaking with? James Leafey. Yes, we've been having a difficulty delivering your parcel and (crazy effects), just wanted to make sure someone's gonna be around. They're dipsticks of some kind, General Motors. And, uh, I'm a supervisor here. Well, to the best of my knowledge, I'm not waiting for a package from General Motors. Uh, it says Dipsticks dot com. You haven't returned any of our voice mails we've left ya, sir. Okay, I'm not expecting anything from General Motors. It's Dipsticks dot com, sir. I believe I stated that. To the best of my knowledge, I'm not waiting for a package from dipstick dot com. What address are they supposedly going to be delivering this to? Do I need to talk to, uh, somebody else, or are you the man of the house, or who am I speaking to here? Well, I told you earlier. My name is James Leafey. And as I said, I'm Federico. United Parcel Service. I've been here for seven months, uh, here at UPS. That's fine, but what I'm trying to determine is, whether or not I'm supposed to be the recipient of this. Uhhh, the only (LPC sond effects interrupt). Yeah? Ummm, I'm not expecting anything, in the automotive line, which I'm presuming Dipstick dot com has something to do with. Either that or it's a pejorative phrase for something else, but I'm not gonna worry about that. (LPC Sound Effects) Oh, you're the recipient, I can guarantee you that. Okay. Worked here for long enough to determine that, for myself, I don't need to check with... Well, I'm just trying to determine whether this was supposed to be a delivery to my business, or to my home. Oh, I've made the determination sir. Well, I haven't. (Laughs). Dipsticks dot com, sir. If you can get in gear here, and get the payment prepared, we can resolve this this evening. Have it to ya, uhh... Sir, I honestly think that you should contact my lawyer, because I've got nothing to do with anybody named Dickstick, Dicks, Dipstick dot com. Ahh, we've left three voice mails, fella. No, you have not. Not at this number. And you have not returned any of our messages, and you haven't responded... Since I have not gotten them, I haven't returned any. Yeah, I know you haven't returned any. I've left you a voice mail, I've left you a slip on the door. At this number? (LPC sound effects) I haven't heard anything from ya, at all. Nothing at all. I don't know what the, uh, obsticle is, but sir, can we resolve this today? Is my question. Certainly! If you'll tell me where you anticipate it being delivered. What is the delivery address on the parcel? Well, I don't have it handy sir, it's on the dock right now. Ah, well! (LPC sound effects) Okay? If you don't have it, then perhaps you should try finding that, so I can determine if this is legitimate. Sir, I've made the determination, as I said. But I have not, sir. - INCOMPLETE TRANSCRIPTION: 2:50 - 7:17 (End of track) has not been transcribed.